Probably it's menses...all the hormones screwed up...
I felt so loney over CNY... didnt enjoy it at all...
Probably I felt sick...and felt lonely...
Probably I sux at managing social... not much people respond to my invitation...or probably too last min...or... I am just forcing people... whatever it is...everytime after I tried to organise a gathering, it will only lead to the same old thought;
What's the fuck of organizing gathering when others dont even appreciate nor attend.
I know...some has own difficulties and problems.... I tried to understand...but the selfish me who wants everything like a princess flared. =P
Afterall... I am simply sick of organising gatherings when all the friend you have are so inactive and buay on... lucky got kor that sounds more active and even say wana mahjong overnite... =D It boast me up.... =D
It felt lonely when you are busy with handling family stuffs and spending time with them...I know, I am just selfish...for wanting to meet u so much... :( I was so weak in the past few days...and wanted you to sayang me... But guess, I somehow survived thru despite I thought I was gona die last nite, being so weak and jelly after the final lao sai... =(
It's so scary...CNY is kinda considered over officially... If nt tmr is weekend... we already have to report to work and school le... X_x;;;
I kinda miss those days where I think I am kinda astray... where I hang out with my RO mates... drinking, mahjonging, and watsoever....the craziest days in my life... besides that, my life been awis so calm and smooth... I miss those crazy days...which will never return... I could never hang out with such big bunch and drink, and gamble, and walk down late nite streets.... laugh like mad gal....watsoever....
It's good to have some notti frens... =D
And worse, I dont even have common friend with u whom we could hang out together...being just we 2 is nice...but, occassionally having a bunch is fun too... but...alright, I am just asking too much...
Perhaps, what I should do for this new year is to stop wanting, just sit there and receive whatever comes to me... and giving whatever I can to others... or probably only to u...
I wanted to explore He Pan with you...but you end up heading down with your family first... >< was kinda sad when I know that... coz I am not the first one that u go there with... I just wana be the first one to do things with u...but I know I cant...coz you have already done so much with others...and this mountain tortise me couldnt bring u to anywhere amusing or what...
Felt so uber depress on this stupid CNY.... haiz...
*sits in a corner and draws circle*
